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part 1 - part 2 - part 3

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Read this Bud Buckley interview with Kid Mercury's ActoGuitar Blog. HERE
Read this Bud Buckley interview with Journalist Michael Manning. HERE
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Friday, August 26, 2005

No Colonoscopies or Strippers Here

I thought I'd be writing about a hurricane raging around me this morning. I can only write about another one taking a weird turn and missing us. Again. But it could turn this way again. If it's south of you, it can get you. But so far I have moved to a place where hurricanes find no attraction.

Speaking of attraction, it's time I paid some attention to some of my search links. The number one search criteria for this site is "The colonoscopy Song."

Colonoscopy Song

They went up the tube to have a look around
Turned the corner and said, "ooo, look what we found!"
We'll just reach out and snip it, see what we can see
You can lie there with an an IV drip and watch it on TV

Colonoscopy, fun as can be
The best drugs and reality TV
Colonoscopy, Colonoscopy

I wasn't serious about this but thought it was clever enough to post for a yuck. Now I find out that people searching for the term "colonoscopy song" are finding me more often than the guy who actually finished and recorded a colonoscopy song called coincidentally The Colonoscopy Song. I hate it when I get an idea and somebody else runs with it and scores. Now I can't even finish it without seeming like I'm trying to rip off an idea. An idea I had independently. And somehow a hysterectomy song just isn't funny at all.

Another disturbing search item that is consistently high on my site is "Strawberry Sandy." Those of you web gawkers who just landed here to find a naked chick, I'm sorry to disappoint you. My reference to Strawberry Sandy had nothing to do with porn. I quoted my producer, Mark Zampella, a while back when we were having one of our typical riffing dialogues. These things often leave us laughing at things funny only to us for some reason. I learned recently that our wives love it when we do that because they love to hear us laugh. Not because anything we said was at all funny. How can I be so in love with women when I truly don't understand them at all? Anyway, Mark was quipping about a remark I made when we were discussing a Lebanese restaurant that advertised Lebanese smoothies. I think I said something derogatory about that beautiful country regarding their abundance of sand over fruit. To which Mark said, "I'll have a Strawberry Sandy, please." It was hysterical at the time because the waiter was at the table and didn't get it right away. I think he disappeared during the ensuing yuck fest and pretended not to have been there. Kind of like when somebody's boob falls out of an evening gown. If you're not paparazzi, you politely look the other way. Or reach for your sunglasses so you don't get caught.

So I'm sorry that I have no stunning hurricane photos from Cathy this morning. Yeah, right! And I could direct you to some stunning colonoscopy photos or to a naked chick named Strawberry Sandy but I'll let you Google that yourself. I don't need any more traffic from those people. They never buy my CD's.

posted by Bud @ 6:34 AM

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