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Wednesday, January 14, 2009

HOW TO "INSTANTLY" IMPROVE THE MUSIC BUSINESS

I've discussed my caffeine consumption earlier this year. It's BIG. Now let's discuss everybody else's.

Two stories caught my eye as I was reading Google News Headlines. That's my primary source of news. It makes it easier to skip all the really "newsworthy" stuff about Britney and Saracuda and what the Obama girls are having for lunch tomorrow. With my journalism degree I'm well armed to know which headlines are non-stories.

The first is a story about how The Tampa Bay twin cities, is number one in caffeine consumption. Who ever conducted the survey must be weighing the coffee grinds in my garbage. Oh, yeah, and green tea bags. I pay cash when I'm buying out so there's no credit card record or this area might be number one with a bullet. Or would we use a steaming pot in this case? No word yet if this data has any connection to the fact that Florida has it's own tag on FARK news.

Other highly caffeinated cities include Seattle, Chicago, New York and Los Angeles. I found it fascinating that 82 per cent of people in the Tampa Bay area don't consider themselves addicted to caffeine. And Denial is a river in Egypt. I'm willing to admit that I'm addicted to caffeine. Nobody has ever tried to hold an intervention for me. They probably realize I'm a more likable when I'm "cookin'" and that I'm just a bit too on the comatose side when I'm not.

But then I stumbled on a story that really caught my attention. An English study has confirmed that the heaviest caffeine consumers are more prone to hallucinations. Like hearing dead people and such. I found this ridiculous until I read down and found that it cited people who drank eight or more cups of "instant coffee" per day. No wonder! One cup of that stuff and I hallucinate that my tongue is stuck to the bottom of a seldom cleaned coffee urn. Is it just me or am I showing some level of cafe'-snobbishness when I say that anyone who would drink instant coffee at that (or any) level is a bit off to begin with? You must be hallucinating to think you're actually drinking coffee to get past the first gulp, in my opinion. But that's just me.

Places that I love to play but seldom pay are coffee houses. Most of them in my area no longer have live music. Maybe they should advertise hallucinogenic instant coffee to generate some really strong business. So yes, the live music scene is still sucking wind but I'm working on making adjustments. No worries. I'm far from asking for donations to support my habit.

posted by Bud @ 3:33 PM

Comments:
they also say you can induce hallucinations with ping pong balls and a radio.

no foolin
 
"Instant coffee" huh? Gross! My mother uses that stuff. I tried it once when I was 17 or so and I threw up. I prefer perked coffee and actually blogged a bit about it today, lol!

Hallucinations? Hmmm... maybe I'll toss in an extra measure of beans ;)
 
I think you're on to something with the coffee shop & hallucinogenic instant coffee connection. I see many dreadlocked customers lining up... wait, I think it's... yes ... they are...ZOMBIES.
 
Before leaving Seattle for parts "south" I had a horrible addition to caffeine. They knew me so well at on coffee shop they had a water bowl for the Buffledog with his name on it - seriously! They did have live music and revolving art/photo exhibits and ... and ... and ... chocolate! Well, no more. Between my Scrooge gene and coffee shops with music so loud you cannot have a conversation I bade my habit goodbye and have joined the vanilla ranks of 2 cups (or less) a day. My doc is happy and I'm healt ... ... ... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
 
Ah yes but Bud you have to remember that it's a UK report and over here when most people make a cup of coffee they use instant.... not everyone. Way back when I was allowed to drink coffee I only drank fresh but I think instant is a lot more popular over here.

Anyway... good luck with the addiction. today is one of the many days I wish I still drank coffee :-(
 
The Mom taught me how to make palatable instant coffee (bring cold water and coffee to a boil together, stirring constantly) but it defeats the purpose of the "instant" part. I do it only when I don't have a working coffeemaker or a French press at my disposal.

I have read that Finland is the coffeedrinkingest country in the world. It's my only reason for ever wanting to go there. I don't know if they have any good beer or not.
 
You know when I drink a lot of coffee I can barely string together a coherent sentence.
 
I think caffeine addictions come standard with journalism degrees.
 
I don't drink coffee so I don't understand the craze. My boyfriend however, needs a cup every morning. What I do understand is that our nice white sink is now yellowish-brown and he wonders how that happened? No amount of bleach or Comet will remove it.
 
I don't drink coffee, but do drink diet pepsi and iced tea quite a bit. I have a hard time telling if I'm addicted to the caffeine or not b/c I truly enjoy the taste of both over water (maybe it's a bit of both). I'm not surprised Seattle is caffed-up. My co-workers will go to Starbucks throughout the day for more coffee and they're like $3-4 a pop.
 
I don't see a problem here. If I weren't caffeinated, I'd be asleep! Actually, I now require caffeine or I can't get to sleep...but who's addicted!?!

When I was in the Seattle area last year, I figured out that the reason for all the caffeine (and roadside espresso stands) is that to get ANYWHERE in WA, you have to drive...a lot...
 
Oh, yeah...forgot to say: although my brother's coffeehouse went under, I *did* just book two gigs at one that roasts its own. No instant there...
 
I love this...Great post!

I am not a coffee drinker, I do however drink tea, but not for the purpose of caffeine. I figure I have far too many other bad habits that I need to maintain...

~j
 
I don't drink coffee or much tea.
I figure if I'm going to halucinate I might as well drink scotch LOL
 
Instant coffee? - INSTANT? - You mean they actually still make that nasty stuff? Ewwwwww. lol

My caffeine intake also comes in the form of soda pops... particularly Diet Mtn Dew. Yummmmmmmm.

I'm still waiting on the hallucinations tho. lol ;)
 
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